Thursday, March 22, 2018
Monday, October 17, 2016
Peace be upon you, dear reader!
Phewww, who have ever expected that it has been 8 months (to the time of writing) now I have been teaching in school. So many to tell, so much to express, and a lot to share. I just came back from a week course at IPG Kampus Rajang, Bintangor and it was really tiring but worth it. Now, I come back to share beautiful things that I have experienced teaching in this very school.
I have no idea how or what to start with, but let make this post personal. I started to love teaching and really looking forward to what I can do to bring changes to the school or my pupils. When I say "started to love teaching", it did not mean that I have no passion in teaching all this while, but it is only now that I regard teaching as important, very very important to me as a teacher. Teaching isn't all about teacher and his teaching, but "Does learning occurs when you teach?" is another story. That very question must be taken into serious thought, however most teachers worry at the figures that received every months in their account.
I realised that, we always need to put ourselves at pupils's shoes. We might think that we deliver the easiest content, yet we blame the kids for their incomprehensible response. Why is it hard for them to understand? -to be continued
Thursday, July 28, 2016
Tuesday, April 19, 2016
Monday, April 4, 2016
I am writing this in the mid of dawn and morning, and it is very cold now.
To recall the last time I dedicated a post here is a cliche, well it has been ages. Been busy socializing in Facebook, Twitter and Instagram the most (because I would spend at least 4 hours every day). I have been good, in fact great! I am here just to inform that I graduated teacher training bout 3 to 4 months ago, and was jobless ever since and now I am a teacher in one of the rural school in interior Mukah, my hometown.
I am a teacher since 1 March 2016 (the day I was first reporting), and I teach Mathematics more than I teach English. This is because my school has enough English teachers compared to Mathematics teacher, so I have to take the responsibilities to teach Maths and I teach only level 1 pupils (Year 1 to Year 3) and imagine the challenges that I have to encounter, when dealing with young kids. So much language barrier (I have to use Malay most of the time when I teach English), lots of action and gestures to enhance understanding and do you have any idea how hard it is to make them understand the basic concept of adding and subtracting in my Maths lesson? The only thing that I would like to express now is OMG! OMG! OMG!
I know this will be fun, what doesn't kill you will make you stronger. After all, it is too early to judge. I have been here a month now, and it will take sometimes for the pupils to accept your way of teaching. Hold on, I am the Class Teacher of Year 2 too and being a class teacher there are many responsibilities that I have to alert and consider. Bla la la la...
Enough said, just wait for my next appearance and probably will write about my school etc. You know I hate typing but I love writing... hmmmm Bye!
Friday, September 4, 2015
It begin on the day I had completed my viva or thesis presentation. Since last term, I did not have a good rapport with my lecturer, partly it was my fault for not making it a point for consultation. It was happened that I got to know the marks she (or can I say both of them?) gave me was just a passing marks, 15 upon 30 marks. I don't mind if my lecturer down-graded me for what I did wrong, but tell me what did I did wrong? My presentation was well-delivered, my friends were really enjoyed and I am sure I did everything (almost) what a viva presentation need, in fact I went beyond extra minutes was I given. I have no idea, how should I know my unconscious mistake if nobody is there to explain and tell me what did I did wrong? Life is so unfair, sometimes. I feel like crying now!
So, I posted a few statuses on my Facebook ranting my disagreement for her action to me. She has personal dislike towards me and it was so unprofessional when you were actually/supposedly evaluating me on my presentation of the day, not evaluating my past or my attitude towards you, as it has nothing to do with the evaluating criteria of a presentation, it was more likely a personal attack. Passing marks was okay, but I am sure I deserve better than that as it was not that I did nothing? Right? I have no idea why some people who has been in the profession for years and an experienced can have this kind of attitude, better hang your degree, your master in the toilet of you decide to act this way. I might sound rude, but please I am just a trainee, a novice teacher. I need your guidance and help, I need you to be there to correct me if I am doing wrong, but I got from you was just silence, and then you down-graded my thesis writing and marks. Is it fair? If you have higher expectation towards me, call me a teacher instead of a trainee.
However, I try to reflect was this all my fault. Partly, yes. I made mistakes, everyone did. I need bigger room of improvement for myself, if and only if you give the chances. It didn't stop here.
I went to Mid Valley, alone that evening to seek for peace and I went for book hunting and a coffee. I ended up buying 3 books; Memories by Lang Leav, Diari Nyonya Gila and Whatever You Sai I am + I am Okay by Anwar Hadi. Then I sat a a coffee shop in the bookshop and unwrapped the books I bought. I spent a few hours there then I decide to watch movie with my friends. I met them at 9pm, we bought movie tickets (We watched Inside Out, I had watched it twice!), then went for a light dinner at Old Town. Then, we went to Starbucks for coffee before movie. My friends bought 2 venti-size coffee and they asked me to out those in my bag as they wanted to bring it into the cinema then we went to buy some popcorn. I remember well I had kept my wallet in my bag again after I made the payment, so we walked into the cinema Hall 3. My bag was damn full with books, laptop and coffees. I took the coffees out from my bag and we were there enjoying our movie till the end. Before we left the cinema, I did check on and under my seats if I had left anything behind me, what I saw was just rubbish that we left on the floor. So we walked out from the hall and went back home. I slept and woke up around 9am then I slept again at 12pm. I woke up for Pasar Malam, and after I brushed my teeth and washed my face, I realised that my wallet was not in my bag. OMG! I HAD LOST IT!!!
There go another bad day in my life. I lost it, for real! Again! So, I will tell ya in another entries as I got to go now. Bye!
Tuesday, August 25, 2015
Friday, July 31, 2015
Sunday, June 28, 2015
Thursday, June 25, 2015
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Have you ever be in a situation, when you are willingly to do whatever it takes to make your loved one happy and to see them smile?
To cut a long story short, I was not supposed to be back this term break as I had planned a 2 vacations with my fellow friends, the first week I'll be going to Phuket, a road trip back to Kuala Lumpur from Hat Yai. Then, I will get back to work on the second week and fly to Padang, Indonesia on the third week and will expected to experience fasting at other country.
But, yesterday morning as I woke up and received a call from my mom, persuading me to go back to Sarawak and I had a hard time saying no, though I had booked all the tickets for the trips and had promised couple of people, how am I going to tell them if I have to cancel everything. My mom did ask me, if I am willing to burn both my tickets to Phuket and Padang, she will book another ticket to Sarawak.
At last, I made up my decision later that evening and I'm coming home. So, I checked on the ticket and it was nearly RM400. So, it was just ok. I was to make the booking but my Maybank2u did not seem to work out, so I ask my mom to buy from an agent, and my friend is working for the agent.
This morning, I received the itinerary from my friend via Whatsapp and was surprised to see the digits, it was fucking RM775 which is double up from what we saw the day before. The perk of buying an air ticket through an agent! And my mom need to pay another RM40 to the agent that sum up a total RM815 for a fucking last minute air ticket. My friend feel bad and even ask my mom few time whether to proceed and my mom without hesitation tell her to proceed, no matter how high the price she had to pay!
I called my mom straight away, she should have call me before making that decision as the air ticket was damn expensive. She said, NEVER MIND AS LONG YOU BE BACK THIS HOLIDAY!
I almost burst to tears, she end the call, yes she did, and I reflect to her sacrificing. Thanks, Mom. You do whatever it takes as long as you will be able to see me this holiday and I don't make burning my tickets to Phuket and Padang to ashes.
I shall remember this date and day, when your mom put her son and children above all!
Thursday, April 30, 2015
Sunday, April 26, 2015
Today I joined the school's sports day and I was satisfyingly happy to see most of my babies from both classes were actively participated in many "acara" and they won most of them. I was so happy to see them running gracefully and happy on the track, they were like the animals out from the zoo. I was never got to see them as happy as they were in the class, they were enjoying themselves so much.
The day before the event, it was raining heavily and storming in KL and affected most of part of Damansara, and my school was affected too. However, to our surprise, when we came to the school this morning, everything was in good condition, even the ruined tents were standing still like nothing had happened the day before. We were in charge of aerobic performance, involving the year 5 pupils and it had left such great impact to the school and its pupil as never in the history the school conducting such aerobic. Then, I did help the teachers preparing for the mascot and volunteered myself to make the shoes of the mascot, Captain America. I slept late the night before finishing the stuff and gone to sleep before 2am in the dawn, leaving it unfinished. When I woke up this morning it was 6am already and I just realised that I have not paint the shoes completely. I jumped from my bed and made my way to the living hall, where were all my project was done. I quickly painted both of the shoes and let it dry then gone for a shower as quick as I could. Then, I had it done at school. Phewww~~~
The performance was great and the pupils were enjoying themselves and had done it so well that I was so happy for them. Though the condition of the field worsen, as it was muddy and wet and we were damped in mud and dirt but we enjoyed it so much. Most of the parents were clicking and snapping and taking videos of their sons and daughters and they were very supportive. The sports day ended nearly at 2.30pm after noon, and if you can imagine the sun killing and burning your skin dry. OMG! But seeing the spirits and determination of the kids, teachers and parents, I almost forgotten the burning. Sports day held once a year, so enjoy the very moment.
(my laptop is running out of battery, so I will update this blog soon as I reach my room and get this charged)
Friday, March 6, 2015
I checked my Whatsapp & one of them was from Suhaina, urgently said that the practice must start at 8.30pm as she has something else on to attend after the practice. Amirul pun cakap, lepas practice baru dinner. So I plan lepas practice nak makan chicken chop kat KK12, UM. So, I mandi cepat so I can make it on time. After I took my bath, Amirul pulak xda dalam bilik, so he must be going to the foyer already. So I made my way to the foyer and nobody was there, I called Suresh instead of Amirul, only to know that both of them keluar sbb Amirul nak beli barang lagi. So I went back to my room. Ok, kenapa Amirul nak go for his sudden plan, sedangkan lepas practice pun I plan nak keluar makan so we can go beli barang together kan? I risau sbb Suhaina had something else to attend after thay? So, I texted Amirul "Since you kat luar, grab your quick dinner as I took mine while waiting for you", so I cancel nk dinner kat KK12. If he can go for his sudden plan, I can go for my sudden plan too. Then, Suhaina called (cos I thought she must be waiting at the foyer) & I told them I waited for Suresh to call then I went down.
Then, Suhaina called balik ckp both of them had arrived. I sambil makan my triple bread with nutella sambil baca Reader Digest took my sweet time. Then Amirul texted me. Then, Suresh called me twice. I ckp I naik tangga walhal baru nak turun. So I naik dorang xstart practice then I saw tables and benches, I thought it was laptop and speakers atas meja rupanya its food. They threw a small surprise feast for me, initially nak buat on the 2nd March sbb elaun xmasuk lagi they hold it on. Whoaaa terharunya practicum mate buat surprise macam ni... hehe. Seriously, I never expect this. Thanks so much!!!
Actually nak type lagi tapi malas dah... ok. Thanks for reading...
Monday, January 19, 2015
Since I move in with a new roomate to a bigger room that I ever had few semesters ago, I caught a flu to date. I have no idea why was I caught with such cold even if I swallowed medicine everyday.
First I thought maybe because I did not get used with the climate, what I meant was the room was cold even if I turned the fan speed to number 3. Then, I started to believe that it had something to do with the dust and cleanliness of the room as when I entered this room on the very first day, I only did a light cleaning. Well, I need to clean the room this weekend.
So, due to this unsettled cold, I was too lazy to wake up and went for classes that I end up bed-rest one whole morning, and was skipped few classes. Just so you know, a few friends were asking where had I been gone. For sure, that wasn't a good start to kick off this year's resolution.
What had happened to a good boy, Izzul?
Well, time changes, so do I...
Till then, keep praying...
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
My feeling nak rush, nak balik. My soul kat rumah, my body is here.
Nak kemas bilik, nak packing barang nak itu dan ini, nak buat laundry, nak study, nak habiskan exam awal, everything you want it in a rush!? Why???
Is like everything you want it to get done at one time, rush!!!
Can I have a break from all this rushing rush???
Sunday, November 16, 2014
Manisnya gembira semalam aku simpan
Pahitnya luka semalam aku telan
Biar hati suruh aku buang
Aku masih mahu simpan sisa semalam
p/s: Sakitnya hati hanya Tuhan yang tahu. Biar aku simpan manis dan pahit ini dan perilaku kamu yang merobek musnah jantung aku saat ia masih bergedup tenang, kerna kau masih menjadi insan yang paling tersayang.
Hold on, I reread my sentences dan aku rasa aku merepek.
But before, there are many things I hate to do before balik cuti semester.
1. Packing barang and angkut barang simpan kat common room.
2. EXAM, yes I have 2 papers awaiting before I can go back home!
3. I am still thinking what it is.
Tak sangka, by this weekend aku dah bangun kat katil aku sendiri kat rumah. I must be feeling like heaven. This term-break katanya nak lose some fats and pounds, well we see about it. This year end holiday jugak my former high school classmate is getting marry! There are many things I want and will do for this upcoming holidays and for sure aku nak berehat sepuasnya as I have not seeing home for more than half a year...
Ok. I supposedly study for my paper tomorrow by I think I am going to read my Murakami's After The Quake first, what about it?
Till then, bye :)
Monday, November 3, 2014
I miss it, when I stare at you blankly and all I can see is your sweet and honesty.
I miss it, when I walk across the beach bare footed and listening to the sound of the waves hitting the white sandy.
I miss it, when I involve you in our deeper conversation and listening to you fully,
I miss it, many things I realize I had been missing and longing that I forget to moving on with this life.
Now, I move on.
Thursday, October 2, 2014
What a zine? Ask Pak Cik Google, he can answer all for you!
Whoever is interested to buy our zine, please visit my IG for more infos on purchasing.
Till then, toodle :)
Monday, September 22, 2014
But, there's always a time when you're feeling down, you escape the whole things that ruining you and you stay away from people, need exactly a-me-time, on your own. Well, I was writing this when I feel like this.
I need time of my own, where I need to organize the scattered feeling in my heart and mind. Too many thing running and chasing, swirling like clothes in the washing machine.
Maybe, I feel down. Life a wheel, some says. Sadly, it is all true. There is a time when you are up high in the blue sky, there is also a time when you re down deep at the bottom of the blue sea, and all you wanted after all is a-me-time, on your own.
Life is a rotation, like a wheel. Bullshit. Sadly, life is a cycle and a rotation. What you give you get back. What goes around, comes around.
Why life can't be so perfect? Well, the answer is in you. The key of life perfection is when you believing everything you have in life is sufficient, and all you ever wanted more is isn't. Nothing else, whatever you have is enough and you are grateful for all this, if only you are, then only you are feeling life is a perfection.
At the moment like this, you need a place like beach and sea. Wide that you are a human seen like an ant. All you wanted to do is to sit on the sand and stare at the sea, looking at it aimlessly while actually sorting whatever swirling in the mind, slowly. All you can heard is the sound of the wave, the sound of the blue sea, the sound of the birds flying freely and nothing else hugs and hits you, but the breeze and wind. A perfect-me-time everyone ever wanted.
I need a-me-time, on my own :)
Why? He has all it to be the one you wanted, but the sense of your feeling seem object and could not react. Why? You resist, you want it, but at the same time you don't want it. Why?
Have you ever feel in the situation. You will recommend someone else's better to be in the place, meanwhile knowing the truthfully fact that you are the one fitting the place in that someone heart.
That is a weird kind of feeling, something that you feel indifferent, a kind of situation when you are watching drama or movie like Confession of a Shopaholic or even the Wedding Planner or even 27 Dresses, where you imagine yourself being one of the main cast, being in the trouble, the one who are chaotic and create problems but in the end the one who lived happily ever after.
You know that your story of life will end to a happy ending, but you are just in love to be in the conflict and trouble, being saved so many times by the hero, at higher point you will said "Hey, I have enough being saved by you!"
That's the feeling, when you want it, but you don't want it!
Friday, September 19, 2014
Saturday, June 28, 2014
Monday, June 2, 2014
By the way, peace be upon you!
Today is my off day from work, since I work six days per week and I have a day break. Tiring, indeed and I really need today to rest, cook my favorite meal, enjoy sipping coffee or latte and lock myself into reading, at the same time escape the reality and enthuse to the fantasy. I had been moving from one coffee shop to another, just to give my tongue different tastes of each. Thus, I come to realize that the cheapest coffee can have a similar taste to the expensive, or maybe I am wrong. Since I have ample of time sitting and reading and sipping, so why don't I spare some little minutes to update my little blog. Too many to tell but I forgotten which and which and where to start. After all, I enjoy today to the fullest.
It's school holiday and my term break as well. My term break this time is nearly a month, what on Earth am I doing in KL and not going back to Mukah? Well, I am going to work my ass out for money as I freaking need a driving license and I have been driving illegally ever since. I remembered the day my mom called ans she asked me to check for the air ticket and insisted me to go back, that the day after I have to decide whether to go back home or not. Since I have place to stay over a month in KL at my friend's house, somewhere located nearby my workplace so I do not have to quit my job and I can earn some cash this holiday, instead having a leisure rest at home, I decided and told my mom that I would not go back Sarawak. Since that day, she keeps calling me almost everyday and I know my family missing me, it has been 5 months, I am never be distance from them this long. However, I am eager and looking forward to see them this coming Eid Mubarak.
(was at the other site)
I feel weak, I don't feel like writing now. Ok, I just want to enjoy my Latte. Bye!
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Monday, May 19, 2014
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
So many things that you left behind regretted, you make it no point to learn from any of those. In fact, you make more mistakes that initially you think what you're doing are all right. You're right, just the way you want it. This is it!
Down. You feel deep down. You cried. You regret. Just for a day or worse just for a few hours. You forgotten. You do it again. You repeat. You feel like bullshit. This is it!
This is it! This is it! This! Is! It!!!
I feel like running away, running away from this planet. To a planet that I am unknown so I start fresh and new. This is it! I never let myself from not thinking the impossible that at last what it got me? Disappointment.
Wake up, you are sleeping too long. You are dreaming too long. Wake up and face the reality. This is it!
Nota kaki: If only I can explain what it is!
What should I do now? I definitely legal to be kicked out from the campus!